What is Love? What People Think is Love?
Posted On
What is Love?
This is the simplest, weirdest and most complicated question simultaneously. For centuries people have been looking for the answer and still failed.
For every person, love is different, and they experience it differently. People belonging to different fields are explained in different ways.
Well, I’m not a psychologist, science person or most loved person or anything, but this question bothers me many times, and it pings my mind that I must write something about it.
Like other people, I also experienced love and its variations, but what are they? I don’t know what love is, but I know that love has different layers; some we like and some we don’t like, but it is original.
How to Identify Love?
It is a stupid question because there is no way to identify love. As I mentioned above, it has many layers so that it can come up with any layer, and you have to see it.
Most people identify with love when they get the favourite part of the layer, and when it is gone, they reject other layers of love.
Movies, scriptures, web series, and other drama serials highlight the good layers of love where both people hold together emotionally, physically, mentally, and economically and stay with each other no matter what happens.
Nowadays, web series and movies highlight the sexual part of love for their TRPs, which is not right because love is a far better and wonderful experience to feel.
When we are talking about love, it is necessary to understand that we are not talking about the sexual chemistry between men and women because love is not only bound to men and women’s sexuality. It is far more than that.
Sex is just one angle to express love, but it doesn’t mean that you cannot express your love towards any other person. You need to understand how much that person matters to you and how you can make them feel that you love them.
Love is beyond physicality, it is beyond psychology, and it is beyond scientific fact. In science, love is just the combination of High levels of dopamine and a related hormone, norepinephrine, which are released during attraction.
Psychology explains love very normally so people can understand and maintain their relationships with other people. But when we come to the mythology section, you can see the layers of love here.
Different mythologies have different views on love. Mostly they explain their love in the form of men and women and sexuality, or they explain love completely divine between the God and people he created. Yes, there is sacrifice, pain, feeling of giving enormously, but the relationship is defined by whether it is human or divine.
But when we move forward with Indian mythology, you can feel the different variations of love, which is not defined in any particular relationship. And not in Hindu mythology, you can see such different layers of Sikh mythology and Buddha mythology.
Yes, we can call it humanity for understanding, and any caste, creed or religion does not bind it; it is enormous.
How to Explain Love with Different Layers?
It is very hard to explain love because it has an endless definitions, but for understanding, we are dividing it into different layers, and I’ll try to explain. If I forgot something, please mention it in the comment section and let me know. Let’s begin with a simple explanation.
Sexual Attraction:
It is the phase where two people feel the physical attraction to each other due to hormones, and they express it with sex and call it love. Well, the physical attraction is very temporary and at one point people get bored with it and look for other mates.
Such love doesn’t last forever, and it gives immense pain of betrayal, self-doubt, and use by other people. Some people also lose their self-confidence due to which either they don’t make the partner, or whenever they pursue another relationship.
They constantly try to please other people and hide their desires and wishes from other people to stay in the relationship, which makes them toxic and feels them that they are not worthy of love which is not true.
Nowadays, people mostly fall for their looks instead of their behaviour. Looks matter, but it is not the entire thing to look forward to in your partner.
True Love:
It is a complicated term for love because what is true about love? If there is something true about love, isn’t there something false about love?
Love is love; it is not true or false (completely personal opinion, so don’t get offended). According to Christian mythology, there is one soulmate for every human being.
The question is. Is it possible for a human being to live with just one person in their whole life? In ancient times it was possible, but nowadays, as we can see that people are breaking apart.
I think the soulmate idea is not good for today, but people can still believe in it, and maybe it is true for some people, as I said we are talking about love and it has different layers so maybe it is.
The actual definition of true love is that one person in the world understands you completely and never leaves your side in any circumstances.
We all want this kind of love in our lives, but we have to pass through so many other layers to get to this part. Still, there is no guarantee that you may get that one person.
Parents Love:
We know that parents’ love is the purest form of love because our parents start loving us before we are born, especially mothers who can sense it and love the child more than their own life.
Parents start preparing for their child’s future before it is born, provide everything they can, and protect them till death.
They can do anything for their child to make them happy and fulfil their life. It is very hard to become a parent because now you have sacrificed your happiness and fulfilled your kids’ happiness.
They teach us to speak, walk, run, educate us, and teach us to identify people, fight with our problems, and overcome failure.
Every parent has different techniques to teach their kids valuable lessons and prepare them for the world. It is an amazing and selfless act because they didn’t get anything in return, and they know it and accept it.
Due to this reason, parents’ love is very divine and compares to God’s love.
Sibling Love:
Yes, it is also another layer of love that we can see in our family. Why is sibling love necessary in this article? I already mentioned that we are discussing the different layers of love, so it is one of them.
After Parents’ love, we can say that the other part is sibling love; it is between the parents’ love and friendship. There is a different kind of fun where you tickle your sibling, tease them, and fight with them, but you still love each other like no one else.
People believe that if you find a good friend in your sibling, you’re the luckiest person in this world, and that is true too. Because your siblings grow with you, they know all your moods, likes, dislikes, crush, and how to beat you, which is the most fun part of having a sibling.
It is very pure because you’re fighting with each other and protecting each other simultaneously. Whether you are brother and sister, two sisters or two brothers, you always love each other no matter what.
If you have any siblings, then while reading this, you must remember how much you annoy them and how much they annoy you, but when you have to share something, happiness, sadness or food or clothes, you must remember them and always think about them.
So it is a ticklish, happy, sad, and fun relationship with siblings.
Friendship:
Yes, it is also one kind of love, and it is very pure, gentle and mostly craved by human beings. It is for both human and divine; you can have friendship with God or make an amazing friend who never leaves you and stands by your side.
Friendship is true love because any gender or relationship does not bind it. We call it friendship because it has everything that a person wants in their life.
In Indian mythology, friendship reaches the divine form and explains that friendship is very important in your life. You can see many examples, such as Krishna and Sudama, where Krishna and Sudama both loved each other unconditionally and accepted each other the way they were. There is no boundary of caste, creed, wealth, or anything else.
Another example is Krishna and Arjun, where Krishna pulls Arjun from a distracted path and gets him to the right path no matter how hard it is to walk. Krishna assures Arjun that he will be on his side till the end no matter what happens.
Yes, there is another amazing example of friendship is Karna and Duryodhan. We know that Duryodhan was a villain, but he never believed in the limits of caste, creed and religion. He welcomes Karna with open hands and offers him the place he deserves, and in return, Karna never leaves Duryodhan’s side even if he is wrong in the future.
Karna was always there for Duryodhan during his good and bad deeds. He never leaves his side and accepts fate as it is coming for him. He never gets afraid of it or blames Duryodhan for it.
These are just three examples; there is a comprehensive history of friendship and how people love to make friends. People would do anything to keep their friendship.
Friendship or Love:
This might be unclear, but let me clarify that it is not about a love affair in the office or a marital affair, but about genuine respect towards your colleague because you work together and help together.
When you work at some place, you create a bond or a friendship. You can say another person helps you with your work or helps you to adjust to the environment.
You can call it to respect if the person is senior; or call it friendship if you are the same age. Everyone who works in any company finds such a support system where seniors teach you about the company’s work, and you find a friend in a colleague who helps you in work and supports you whenever needed.
To get such a bond on work premises is typical hard because everyone came here to work, and at such places, most people fight silently for their appraisals. But if you get such a friend on your premises who become your best friend for the rest of your life, you’re very lucky.
It is also important to get such a friend in your field because that person can understand the work pressure on you. That maybe your other friends, partners or parents won’t be able to understand.
People are very different in their personal and professional lives. Human beings never sustain without any bond, so a colleague’s friendship is unique. As any other kind of love (here, we express love as respect, friendship, and admiration).
Marriage:
Every mythology says that there is one person you have to marry, and that person will love you till death. For some people, it works, and it won’t work for many people.
Marriage is a completely different relationship than any other. It can be considered a whole new adventure where you have to live with another person and make compromises or sacrifices at some time.
Marriage is considered a holy married, and people must treat each other with respect, love and honesty. This relationship works in many ways; you have to try different keys to work this relationship.
People used to say, “It is very important to communicate in marriage if you want it to work”. Communication is the key to every relationship, and to maintain the marriage. It is necessary to communicate with each other with an open mind.
No one quote or advice helps you in your marriage. You have to try different solutions to maintain the marriage and live with your partner.
You can turn the marriage into a beautiful relationship, make it a friendship or end it as a disaster; it is all in your hands.
Humanity:
It is also a different kind of love where you help people with their basic needs without expecting anything in return. Humanity is the only thing that binds the whole world with each other.
With the help of this humanity, you can build a friendship with other people, and this is the only kind of divine love. Some layers are selfish or consider one person or one family.
But humanity includes every person and helps people build their lives by themselves, and in return, it won’t ask anything. Sikh mythology and Hindu mythology are the biggest examples of humanity.
We all know that India accepts people the way they are without converting them or changing them. India is the actual example of humanity because there are many different kinds of religions in India. People of India belongs from various beliefs, and India accepts their beliefs.
The Sikh community is famous for helping other people without any return favour. They help them without knowing about their religion and offer them help whenever needed.
It connects with you nature animals, birds, mammals, and the whole environment, and you work for that.
Sprituality:
It is directly connected to God, where people worship God with their completefaith. They perform some rituals or remember them and help other people.
In India, you can find yogis, sadhu, and a spiritual person who helps you experience the divine. There is a guru concept in every religion that helps common people to experience the divine.
You can go to any spiritual guru to experience the divine or do it yourself with sacrifice and hardwork, just like Lord Buddha did.
There are many ways to experience divine love, and when you feel it. You don’t desire any other kind of relationship or love in your life.
It is really rare, and it is also known as bhakti that many people did and reached salvation. In India, you can directly worship God with the mantra and perform some rituals.
But the people who do not believe in such things can go with self-learning; as I say, there are millions of paths to reach the divine.
You can watch and learn by yourself to reach divinity. It is the most crucial path, but people believe that we all are heading towards it, and we don’t even know about it.
Self-Love:
Let me clarify the difference between self-love and selfishness because there is a slight difference between these 2 things. In self-love, you understand yourself better.
You know what is good for you and what is not. Apart from that, you choose the things to do according to the situation, not only for your benefit but also for everyone.
While in selfishness, you think about yourself and always want validation and admiration from other people. It is very important for you that other people admire you and follow you. Things are only for your benefit, and you do not consider other people as human beings.
Materialistic Love:
It is the opposite of divine love. Here you love yourself, your body, your clothes and every worldly thing that is important in this world.
It is important but temporary only; at some point, everyone feels that there is missing something, and then the whole soul search thing begins.
Conclusion of Love:
There is no perfect definition of love, you give your best to the people in life, and they will move on when the time comes. You have two choices: either you love them the way you were or change the form of love, but you can’t unlove yourself.
It will just transform. So we wish you feel loved and special in your unique way and always capable of loving others. If you like to add anything to this article, let us know in the comments.
Diksha Jani is a blogger, writer and SEO expert. likes to read books on various topics such as philosophy, history, crime, mythology, psychology, and so on.